So, this fatherhood thing must really be getting in my head. I mean, not just my thoughts, but my deep subconscious, the place that no one will ever be able to see unless they created me or took a $13.95 a month hypnosis course. About a month ago I had a dream...no not the Martin Luther King, Jr. kind, although this did involve my child. In my dream Erin had "Peanut". Being the good husband and father I am, I was at the driving range the whole time. As I met my child for the first time, I cringed (maybe for real, but definitely in my dream) as I took hold of the MOST HIDEOUS CHILD I HAD EVER SEEN! I mean, everyone thinks their kid is cute, but you wouldn't have heard that argument from me. Waking up from the cold sweat, I realized the reality of such tragedy was not to be. Then two nights ago, a similar dream. This time I was there for the birth (whew!) and "Peanut" seemed normal. That's when I "realized" that I had not called my parents for 4 days about the news. As I picked my newborn up to call the grandparents (like "Peanut" was going to say "HEY GUYS! I'M HERE!") imagine my surprise when I picked up what can only be described as the love child of Oscar the Grouch and Groucho Marx. Needless to say, I may not sleep until June 14.